We want what’s best for our children, so we try to raise them through love and discipline. But how do we reconcile the two when faced with less than desirable behavior from our child?
1. Explain the Reason Behind Attitude Corrections
Children do not always understand the reason behind the consequences they have to face. They might have a hard time appreciating why they have to suffer the consequences of their actions.
Parents do not usually explain the need for discipline because they simply want to bring down the child’s bad attitude or behavior. But it is crucial to teach the child that unacceptable actions lead to bad consequences.
The parent should always explain why the child has to face the consequences, and this explanation should be in terms that the child can easily comprehend. Make sure always to tell the truth and explain the reasons calmly.
2. Speak Firmly, But Kindly
It is important to maintain a firm attitude when correcting a child's attitude. It is important to keep the child in check but without causing fear or intimidation.
Children get scared of parents who use harsh tones. If you are angry and using a harsh tone to communicate with your child, then you are just causing the child to feel more scared.
So always speak firmly but kindly when correcting a child’s behavior. Speak calmly, and make sure that the child understands why you are doing it.
3. Tell Them What They Should Do, Instead of What They Shouldn't
One of the best ways to teach a child to choose the right behavior is by telling them what they should do instead of what they shouldn’t do.
This type of correction will encourage the child to think about the consequence of their actions, and give them a greater perspective about what is acceptable and what is not.
4. Acknowledge Your Child's Feelings
You should never ignore a child’s feelings if they are getting frustrated or angry.
The best way to deal with their anger is by showing them empathy and acknowledging the feeling behind their actions.
By doing this, you are helping the child realize that there are better ways to deal with anger and frustration.
5. Find Alternatives to Physical Punishment
Parents should avoid punishing children physically because it does not help build their self-esteem and does not teach them to use more effective ways to deal with anger and frustration.
Physical punishment, however, will make the child a victim of hatred and anger and does not help in the actual behavioral correction.
So rather than inflicting pain on your child for disobedience, use alternative methods to emphasize the importance of the consequences of their actions.
6. Forgive Yourself
When correcting your child's behavior, you might sometimes feel sad or angry about it. You might even feel sad about your child’s attitude.
There’s nothing wrong with feeling like this, but you should always remind yourself that you are trying to teach your child a very important behavior.
Remember also that your child is far from perfect and has a lot of flaws that need to be worked out. Forgive yourself for the mistakes that you make in the process of correcting and reprimanding your child.
Discipline Right
It is not impossible to discipline your child with love and by showing affection. It is only a matter of finding the right way to do it and using a tone that is not threatening or intimidating.
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